Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I think people are normalizing furries
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