dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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