we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize