somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
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Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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