So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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