Well douche your snatch and let's go!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize