So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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