So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
