ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
