Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
