So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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