We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
