And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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