Walk of Shame. In a state park.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
