I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
