Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
