Kiss
Puke
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
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I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I think i got beer on your cat.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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