I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dick very happy bro
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
