i jhust puked up my retainher.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
