Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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