Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".