Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
