It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I forget how to act sober
Randomize