She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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