Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize