Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
