Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
