I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
She bit a glass in half.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me