Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
