I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize