Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
