Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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