when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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