Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
