ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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