Already got asked if we're dating
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
