it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
