she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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