The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
