This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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