watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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