All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
