She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
