Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
