champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
