The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She's the barista slut.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize