I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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