wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize