just come out here and I will go home with you...
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
