I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize