He disabled his match.com account in front of me
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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