I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
