Jerry, you need to find god
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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